Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
What do you call a fight between film actors?
There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
Chuck Norris gives Freddy Kruger nightmares.
Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer...
...sadly he never cries....
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, it breaks because it is smart enough to know not to get in the middle of Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris does a push up he does not push up, he pushes the world down.
Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
Some people wear Superman Underwear, Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.
On the other hand, Chuck Norris wears no underwear.
People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.